So I went to the Fertility Specialist (FS) for the first time the other day. The waiting room was gorgeous - my type of interior decorating for sure. My husband and I decided that only I would go... he had meetings that day, and if this journey ends up long, we need to save as many sick days between us as possible. As I was sitting in the waiting room however, I started feeling a little nervous. I'm not sure why. I guess it's a big step. I regretted not bringing my husband.
I eventually was called, and met my FS, Michael. We went into his room and he got right into it. I had filled out their questionnaires prior to my visit, but it was short notice so they only received them the night before. He hadn't had time to read them and instead asked me some key questions. Didn't ask about my hubby though. He did a quick examination, looked at the blood results which were perfect, didn't seem too concerned about anything at all.
He wrote out a request for both hubby and me to have a karyotype blood test that tests for chromosomal abnormalities and sent me on my way, his parting words being - "go get yourself pregnant!" Well, I don't have any trouble doing that! It was all over and done with in about 10 minutes. It didn't feel complete. It didn't feel important. In fact, it felt a bit... meh. That's the only way I can describe it.
I understand that to him, I'm a fairly non-important case. I may well go and get pregnant and have a perfectly normal pregnancy right away. I am probably one of his most uncomplicated patients at the moment. But to me, it is super important. To me, it's complicated. To me, this is the most important thing in my life right now. I'm not sure what I really want from him. I guess I like hearing people's thought processes. I like doctors to explain EVERYTHING to me that they have deduced from the information I gave them. I like to know all the possibilities that exist that they have ruled out for me and why. I like to know ALL the possibilities that may exist for me, no matter how remote the chance (because hey, three miscarriages is a remote chance but it still happened)! I'm not sure whether that sort of thing will come with time, as our relationship develops, or as my case becomes more complicated to him. Or if I need to ask him. Or if I just won't get that. And if I don't get that, am I happy with that?
One good thing though, my GP is great. She does all the explaining, deducing and delving and tells it all to me. I love it. So I can always tell her everything the FS is doing, and she's not afraid of giving me her opinion and suggesting things I can talk to him about. Maybe she will be my outlet. I better keep those medicare receipts for tax time!
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