Reflection

The last 12 days has seen me settling into my new life as a mum.  It has been so overwhelming, tiring and all-consuming that I haven't really taken the time to reflect on the journey I have taken to get to where I am now.  As I previewed my previous blog post - of the birth of my beautiful daughter - it suddenly all came back to me.  The emotions welled inside me and I sat and I read and I cried.  I made it.  I have a daughter.  We have a family.  There was a time when I wondered if I would be lucky enough to say that.

Lara

I awoke at 1am on Thursday April 12 feeling what I knew immediately to be contractions.  I decided to get up and try a few different things to see if they would go away or lessen, or speed up, to let me know whether labour might be imminent or a long way off.  Well, the contractions continued to come every 10 minutes, and nothing changed them, so I figured this was it.  I popped on the TENS machine, went back to bed with a heat pack and rested.  

My husband woke at 4am and so I let him know.  He was super excited but I suggested he go into the other room to sleep the rest of the morning as I was starting to get a bit restless in bed. 

We got up about 6.30am, had a bite to eat, then decided to go for a walk around the neighbourhood.  This really helped to bring the contractions on and by the end of the walk, they were coming every 4 minutes and lasting 50 seconds.  We went back home and continued to have contractions coming every 3-4 minutes which lasted between 90-120 seconds.  I did about half an hour of yoga but then I started having to stop with each contraction, lean on the bench and swing and breathe or moan with them.  I mostly paced up and down the hall in between with my husband following me giving me massages.

We decided to head into the hospital at 11.30am for a progress update.   Contractions were long, regular and coming 3-4 in every 10 minutes and I really just wanted to know what my body was doing so I could plan how I wanted to cope.  Well, devastatingly, I was only 1cm dilated.  All that work and only that far!  Goodness!  So we went home again and I got in the bath.  This was beautifully relaxing and I managed to chill out for almost 2 hours.  Hubby caught up on some sleep until the contractions ramped up and I was no longer comfy in the bath.  I then turned the shower on and my husband would run the shower head over my stomach and back during contractions.  I was getting a bit noisy at this time so I think the whole neighbourhood knew what was going on!  

Come 5pm and my waters broke.  So in to the hospital we headed.  This time I was 4cm dilated, but easily stretched to 6cm.  All the birthing suites were full so I laboured for 1.5 hours in an assessment unit.  There was a shower in there so that’s where I headed.  I also tried the gas but my contractions peaked so early that it didn’t have time to work and be effective.   It also made me awfully nauseous so I gave that up.  

About 6.45pm (I think) I was taken to a birthing suite where a big tub was waiting for me.  I got in to the water but the contractions were coming on so often and so strong that I just couldn’t settle there.  I think it was this time that I hit transition.  My poor husband was getting squeezed, hit and his hair pulled with each contraction and I have to say I was pretty damn noisy but still trying to breathe okay – thanks to hubby reminding me.  I started throwing up – not that I had anything in me – but I know I filled 3 bags – lovely!!  I don’t know if I could’ve settled into these contractions better if I hadn’t been moved right at that time... I think perhaps that if I was already in the shower and in a rhythm when transition hit, I might’ve gone on a bit longer and not been so affected but I just wasn’t coping that well so decided on an epidural.

The midwife got me up on the bed for a quick examination and I was 7cm.  I then had to stay up there even though the anaesthetist wasn’t there yet.  I wasn’t happy about this as I HATED contracting up there.  The anaesthetist was there pretty quickly (10 minutes?).  It took about 6 contractions before the cannula and epidural was in and then another 4 before I started feeling the effects.  It was now 7.20pm and I was exhausted!!  The next 3 hours were just bliss.  I relaxed on the bed, while hubby snoozed in a bean bag and had a bite to eat.

The midwife was monitoring the contractions – which I had to relearn what to feel for as it was more of a tickle in my uterus followed by a pressure down below.  The midwife thought the contractions were only moderate in strength so around 10pm she decided to put me on a syntocinon drip to make them a bit stronger and longer.  Well, she hooked me up then had a quick look and she was shocked to see hair!!!  I didn’t need the syntocinon after all – she was on her way!!  She told me she’d call the ob and we’d start pushing in 20 minutes – just let her come down on her own for a bit longer.

Well, the obstetrician got there, they coached me how to push and off we went.  With the help of a mirror, I could see the progress I was making and after 20 minutes, at 10.48pm, out came my beautiful baby.  It was the most amazing experience of my life.  DH was totally stoked as well.  They put my little girl on my chest where they rubbed her pretty vigorously as she wasn’t wailing loud enough for them!!  They then took her over for a quick bit of oxygen as they really wanted to hear a better cry but she was gaining lovely colour and had gorgeous pink lips so she was ok, just quiet!  They brought her back pretty quickly, and she straight away started rooting around for the breast.  The midwife helped pop her on and she suckled for ages.  I’m finally a Mum!